So much for the afterglow
Ok, I admit it. I'm a scared little girl who acts like a punk to try to force back the tears. Maybe. Frankly I don't know anymore. I don't know if I even want to know anymore.
Yesterday I made the decision that I didn't want to know anymore. I don't want to know whether or not there's something behind my being uncomfortable about sex.
I hate life. I hate making decisions. I refuse to make that decision. How can I be expected to?
THERE ARE NO FACTS. That's what I hate so freaking much. That there's no such thing as a fact. We pretend that we know what's going on. But we don't. We never have, we never will, life is futile, right?
I forgot meds last night. Only I don't feel sick, so maybe I just forgot that I took them. I don't even know. All I know is that I was tired last night and slept in nat's bed hugging the wall. Nat really doesn't share her bed well. Her own fault. She made me watch the movie with her, I was tired, I wasn't gonna stay awake.
On the brighter side, in Vegas I'm gonna see the Blue Man Group. If Nat's friend lets me, I'll also be seeing.... *trumpets* WAYNE NEWTON cause he's freaking awesome. My hero. I did a presentation on him and sang Danke Schoen for my debate class. Got lots of laughs. Good times. Dinner time.
Yesterday I made the decision that I didn't want to know anymore. I don't want to know whether or not there's something behind my being uncomfortable about sex.
I hate life. I hate making decisions. I refuse to make that decision. How can I be expected to?
THERE ARE NO FACTS. That's what I hate so freaking much. That there's no such thing as a fact. We pretend that we know what's going on. But we don't. We never have, we never will, life is futile, right?
I forgot meds last night. Only I don't feel sick, so maybe I just forgot that I took them. I don't even know. All I know is that I was tired last night and slept in nat's bed hugging the wall. Nat really doesn't share her bed well. Her own fault. She made me watch the movie with her, I was tired, I wasn't gonna stay awake.
On the brighter side, in Vegas I'm gonna see the Blue Man Group. If Nat's friend lets me, I'll also be seeing.... *trumpets* WAYNE NEWTON cause he's freaking awesome. My hero. I did a presentation on him and sang Danke Schoen for my debate class. Got lots of laughs. Good times. Dinner time.
posted by Cynic at 6:29 PM
1 Comments:
Shells,
I know exactly how you feel about that one...and it's totally not fair, how CAN we be expected to make that decision? I'm having a rediculous time with that right now and it's just like...it just takes over my mind. Just wanted to say whatever decision you do make there are people there to support you all the way. Love ya much,
Ashley
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